0:00:01.640,0:00:08.160
Welcome to The Satisfied Woman podcast in this
episode we'll dig in to what it takes to really
0:00:08.160,0:00:15.600
be the kind of feminine woman that attracts the
right kind of masculine partner you don't have
0:00:15.600,0:00:21.440
to even hardly dig deep into Google or Amazon
if you do a quick search on the top books for
0:00:21.440,0:00:27.480
women titles that include this kind of thing
are at the top of the list it shows that this
0:00:27.480,0:00:33.760
is a big area of interest for us so I want to
give you some tips and techniques to find the
0:00:33.760,0:00:40.600
right masculine partner for you welcome to
the satisfied woman podcast I'm your host,
0:00:40.600,0:00:46.720
Alanna Kaivalya, Ph.D. This podcast is dedicated
to helping women lean into their femininity and
0:00:46.720,0:00:53.760
rediscover the power of their feminine gifts we
take a look at what it means to be a modern woman
0:00:53.760,0:01:04.920
and how we can live A Satisfied life on our own
terms visit the hub at thesatisfiedwoman.com. All
0:01:04.920,0:01:12.800
right so I know that this might feel a little at
least it does to me maybe controversial or maybe
0:01:12.800,0:01:20.440
not appropriate given that the work that I do
truly centers around empowering feminine women
0:01:20.440,0:01:25.800
with my book The satisfied woman reclaiming
your feminine power I aim to teach women how
0:01:25.800,0:01:31.160
to really embody and embrace their femininity
in this modern-day world to make sure that they
0:01:31.160,0:01:37.440
live a satisfied life and in this day and age
of female empowerment and women can do anything
0:01:37.440,0:01:43.440
perhaps sometimes we've heard and I've heard
maybe you have as well the line over and over
0:01:43.440,0:01:50.000
again I don't need a man we can do it ourselves
life doesn't require a partner look all of that
0:01:50.000,0:01:58.280
is true I'm not here to rewrite that script or to
take away from anyone who currently isn't seeking
0:01:58.280,0:02:07.680
a partnership an intimate part parip however let's
be honest at some point in our lives we will be
0:02:07.680,0:02:15.200
interested in an intimate partnership we just will
be as humans we're hardwired for intimacy we're
0:02:15.200,0:02:21.400
hardwired for connection we want to establish an
intimate relationship with another human being
0:02:21.400,0:02:30.320
because we deeply desire to be seen to be known
and to be loved that's just who we are that's just
0:02:30.320,0:02:37.800
human so while there may be this rhetoric nowadays
of we don't need a man or we don't need a partner
0:02:37.800,0:02:44.680
in life we can do it all ourselves I want to
challenge that a little bit or at the very least
0:02:44.680,0:02:51.720
I want to give you permission to want a partner
have a partner seek a partner if that is what is
0:02:51.720,0:02:57.680
on tap for you right now if that feels natural
and right for you and again there may be times
0:02:57.680,0:03:02.520
in your life where you swear it off there may be
times in your life where you don't want a partner
0:03:02.520,0:03:09.240
or you're happy being single but in case you are
in a time of your life that you'd like to have an
0:03:09.240,0:03:16.400
intimate partner let me give you some insight
as to how to find the right one now what I can
0:03:16.400,0:03:24.400
say that I disagree with in terms of this idea
of feminism being we can do it all ourselves is
0:03:24.400,0:03:31.520
that we don't need an intimate partnership we do
at some point in our lives we just do it's very
0:03:31.520,0:03:38.240
difficult for any human to survive their entire
life on their own we're not built that way in fact
0:03:38.240,0:03:45.600
evolutionarily speaking we have gotten where we've
gotten today because we have a tribal mindset
0:03:45.600,0:03:52.240
because the success of our intimate group our
familial group and our tribal group is important
0:03:52.240,0:03:59.840
to our own success look we can't just turn off
millions of years of training we're here to be in
0:03:59.840,0:04:06.600
partnership with other people and we're here to
be in Intimate partnership particularly feminine
0:04:06.600,0:04:12.120
women now I get it that might sound unfair
because I didn't list everybody everybody is
0:04:12.120,0:04:19.760
hardwired to be in Partnership even masculine
men even anybody on this planet absolutely but
0:04:19.760,0:04:25.320
what I want to suggest is that the nuances of
that desire and need for feminine women are a
0:04:25.320,0:04:34.200
little bit different we need it because our DNA
is encoded with this tribal desire for us to have
0:04:34.200,0:04:41.000
longevity we not only want our physical body and
ourselves to survive but we also want our progeny
0:04:41.000,0:04:50.280
to survive and in a tribe setting that actually
requires a good solid steady partner who is there
0:04:50.280,0:05:00.040
to provide and protect this is simple history and
simple basic human structure now whether not you
0:05:00.040,0:05:06.600
want a family whether or not you want children as
a feminine woman this is still in your DNA there
0:05:06.600,0:05:16.920
is still this hormonal biological genetic encoding
to desire a committed partnership again longterm
0:05:16.920,0:05:22.680
short-term you choose I'm not dictating the terms
I just want to give you the background on where
0:05:22.680,0:05:29.960
this drive and desire comes from it doesn't
indicate weakness either just because would
0:05:29.960,0:05:36.440
like to have an intimate partner doesn't suddenly
mean you're doing Womanhood wrong or doing modern
0:05:36.440,0:05:41.960
Womanhood wrong in this day and age you're doing
it absolutely right I would suggest that part of
0:05:41.960,0:05:50.760
the fullness of life experience includes intimacy
and partnership I would further suggest that
0:05:50.760,0:05:57.080
especially in this day and age where a woman can
handle all the basic things about her life she can
0:05:57.080,0:06:01.960
pay her own rent she can get a job she can handle
her bills she can open her own bank account she
0:06:01.960,0:06:08.240
can drive her own car the ways in which women
have achieved independence mean that intimate
0:06:08.240,0:06:16.240
partnership may not serve those basic functions
of providing for Safety and Security in life but
0:06:16.240,0:06:24.040
may serve a higher basic function in terms of the
emotional and psychological satisfaction that a
0:06:24.040,0:06:31.000
woman craves we are after all more than just
physical beings we're emotional beings we're
0:06:31.000,0:06:39.440
intuitive beings we're creative beings we're
sensual beings so again in this day and age of
0:06:39.440,0:06:46.200
fierce Independence and pride amongst women for
being able to do things theirselves I'm I'm all
0:06:46.200,0:06:54.720
for it I'm all for it there still will be places
in our life that intimate partnership will serve
0:06:54.720,0:07:01.320
that really we need someone else to help with and
that's okay again it's not a sign of weakness it's
0:07:01.320,0:07:07.600
a sign of the fullest expression of your life it's
a sign that you're not negating anything or saying
0:07:07.600,0:07:15.920
no to anything in your life that might actually
bring you more joy pleasure sensuality self-
0:07:15.920,0:07:22.320
knowledge having an intimate partner may actually
bring you a greater sense of Safety and Security
0:07:22.320,0:07:28.960
yeah perhaps on the financial side of things or on
just the physical security side of things but on
0:07:28.960,0:07:33.880
the spirit spiritual side of things the emotional
side of things the psychological side of things
0:07:33.880,0:07:42.440
don't discount those as well what I want for
all satisfied women is to have a rich and full
0:07:42.440,0:07:50.000
life experience and that does include intimate
partnership now for those of us women like you
0:07:50.000,0:07:58.240
and like me who identify as feminine women then
we are looking for a masculine partner now if
0:07:58.240,0:08:04.200
you've read my book or listen to my other podcast
then you know that the energies of masculinity and
0:08:04.200,0:08:13.080
femininity exist inside every human regardless of
gender regardless of sexuality so I'm not placing
0:08:13.080,0:08:18.720
any limits either on how you express yourself or
how your partner expresses yourself or how you
0:08:18.720,0:08:25.960
express your sexual preferences everything under
the sun is okay for the sake of this podcast what
0:08:25.960,0:08:31.680
I will be addressing are feminine women who
are looking for a masculine partner and who
0:08:31.680,0:08:38.120
are looking for primarily a masculine man as
a partner again everything under the sun is
0:08:38.120,0:08:43.840
okay this is just how I'll be languaging things
and speaking about things in this podcast but
0:08:43.840,0:08:50.160
please hear me when I say that every expression is
possible and it's just the limits of this podcast
0:08:50.160,0:08:55.040
the time we have and my ability to speak in a
concise manner on these things that's limiting
0:08:55.040,0:09:02.440
my language for now so for the feminine woman
who is looking for the masculine man the true
0:09:02.440,0:09:10.160
masculine partnership again long-term short-term
whatever term you desire here's another um perhaps
0:09:10.160,0:09:18.640
counterintuitive concept to today's fiercely
independent female in order to find a masculine
0:09:18.640,0:09:29.600
counterpart we will need to drop the masculine
mask now Dawning the mask of the masculine for
0:09:29.600,0:09:40.560
the modernday independent Fierce fabulous female
is not easy we live in a patriarchal culture we
0:09:40.560,0:09:49.120
live in a society that values masculine energy
and principles over the feminine we have been
0:09:49.120,0:09:57.200
raised to even ourselves diminish and repress the
feminine because it isn't as good let's say or
0:09:57.200,0:10:03.560
looked upon as good as things that are masculine
as women we're told we have to give ourselves away
0:10:03.560,0:10:11.960
and so we do and we feel burnt out when women are
ravaged and not ravished then our femininity is
0:10:11.960,0:10:18.840
being exploited this is the condition of our
current culture and so Dawning the mask of the
0:10:18.840,0:10:29.000
masculine can not only be a pathway to traditional
ideals of success it can be a method of protection
0:10:29.000,0:10:35.360
because because exposing ourselves as the feminine
beings that we are in certain settings in certain
0:10:35.360,0:10:42.440
scenarios may not actually be safe for example
something as innocuous as wherever it is that
0:10:42.440,0:10:50.040
you work your workplace may have the old school
deeply indoctrinated paradigms of masculinity
0:10:50.040,0:10:56.960
built into it it may want a leader and followers
they may have a hierarchical structure they may
0:10:56.960,0:11:03.200
have key performance indicators or kpi they may
have monthly goals or quarterly goals you may be
0:11:03.200,0:11:09.840
accountable for some sort of metric that you have
to reach some sort of very directed and linear
0:11:09.840,0:11:18.080
definition of success now that is all masculine
and it doesn't mean that we can't not only play
0:11:18.080,0:11:23.760
that game but totally KCK Gass we just have to
recognize that those are all masculine principles
0:11:23.760,0:11:32.640
and values and they require us to elevate our
masculine side in order to participate in that now
0:11:32.640,0:11:38.400
if we're lucky enough to have a workplace or if we
are lucky enough to have maybe our own business or
0:11:38.400,0:11:45.920
our own menture or at least our own freedom to do
with our lives as we wish in terms of career then
0:11:45.920,0:11:53.800
we might be able to cultivate the kind of culture
that values femininity and feminine principles
0:11:53.800,0:11:59.240
even in the workplace one of my favorite
examples of this is actually um channy Nicholas
0:12:00.280,0:12:06.200
she's an astrologer she's a very well-known
astrologer she has an app she's incredibly
0:12:06.200,0:12:13.960
successful and she and her life partner have
created her business this app the Outreach that
0:12:13.960,0:12:22.600
they do all of the things that are under their
empire from deeply feminine principles it is
0:12:22.600,0:12:29.320
possible to achieve wild success from deeply
seated feminine values in the workplace it's
0:12:29.320,0:12:37.800
just right now at least not the norm so we might
be in a workplace setting where we have to Dawn
0:12:37.800,0:12:44.720
the masculine we might live alone where we have
to do the masculine and The Feminine for ourselves
0:12:44.720,0:12:50.720
which again living in this kind of culture
means we often lean into the masculine more
0:12:50.720,0:12:56.600
than we would like to as feminine women so Dawning
the mask of the masculine is often a reality for
0:12:56.600,0:13:02.680
women of today and it can be difficult to find
places and spes and circumstances where we can
0:13:02.680,0:13:10.960
truly drop that mask or it can be hard to drop
it because we're so used to keeping it now this
0:13:10.960,0:13:17.360
is one of the challenges that I hear about when I
speak to women about finding a masculine partner
0:13:17.360,0:13:24.080
because believe me as much as we'd like to be the
independent DIY do everything for ourselves and
0:13:24.080,0:13:29.320
everyone else female who can play that masculine
game and achieve all the success in life and not
0:13:29.320,0:13:38.560
need anybody my own experience is that when you
get women together in a place where they feel safe
0:13:38.560,0:13:46.120
what they express is a deep sense of longing
and burnout a place where they can simply be
0:13:46.120,0:13:53.880
themselves and really downshift into the feminine
into that sensual creative side of themselves so
0:13:53.880,0:13:59.040
we need places and spaces that hold the masculine
for us and look we're working on that too
0:13:59.960,0:14:06.640
but one of the first places and spaces that we
can cultivate where we're allowed to be in our
0:14:06.640,0:14:13.920
feminine is an intimate partnership the right
masculine partner can hold the masculine for us
0:14:13.920,0:14:21.520
we effectively Outsource it to them so that we
allow our feminin femininity to flourish that
0:14:21.520,0:14:28.360
is so critical to our own sense of well-being
our own sense of authenticity our own sense of
0:14:28.360,0:14:35.400
connection to ourselves and our own ability to
express ourselves with the fullest might that we
0:14:35.400,0:14:43.080
are capable of it allows for things to germinate
inside of us whether that be an actual family or
0:14:43.080,0:14:51.520
whether that be a new idea something creative in
ways that don't really have the space to flourish
0:14:51.520,0:14:56.960
if we're constantly holding the masculine for
ourselves when we do that as feminine women
0:14:56.960,0:15:03.240
we create a lot of tension in our minds and our
bodies and our hearts and if you're listening to
0:15:03.240,0:15:09.000
this and you feel both a heaviness when I talk
about it and a sense of relief when I tell you
0:15:09.000,0:15:15.640
that yes there is hope then you understand what
I'm saying and you understand it on a soul level
0:15:15.640,0:15:22.640
I've felt it too I've been there I was absolutely
taught about the DIY nature of being a successful
0:15:22.640,0:15:29.080
female and having to do everything for myself and
I I can do it I'm sure you can too or at least on
0:15:29.080,0:15:36.320
some level or maybe you're yearning to so let's
not take this idea of intimate partnership as
0:15:36.320,0:15:43.120
weakness let's take it as a strength a way for
us to have a strong outlet for our femininity
0:15:43.120,0:15:49.720
which It ultimately is going to make us more
powerful when we try to hold both polarities
0:15:49.720,0:15:56.040
for ourselves we become exhausted and we can't
do either one well when we have a partner who
0:15:56.040,0:16:03.280
can hold our opposing polarity then we get to
lean into who we are most fully and flourish so
0:16:03.280,0:16:08.240
intimate partnership is a source of strength and
a source of power but we got to find the right
0:16:08.240,0:16:15.960
partner now look I'm not going to lie that is also
incredibly difficult in this day and age of dating
0:16:15.960,0:16:21.720
apps and the difficulty of meeting people out
and about especially post pandemic this isn't
0:16:21.720,0:16:28.160
an easy Journey for anyone now I don't know how
to counsel you through the use of dating apps or
0:16:28.160,0:16:35.880
the screening of of people but what I can say is
that when you are embarking on finding the right
0:16:35.880,0:16:43.040
masculine partner or finding the man of your
life the one who can hold that post for you is
0:16:43.040,0:16:50.240
you have to inhabit the feminine I can't tell
you how many women I've spoken to who as soon
0:16:50.240,0:16:58.840
as they start dating they say to me Alana you
know all these men are intimidated by me now I
0:16:59.400,0:17:04.960
understand that I mean women can be powerful but
it's likely that they're not intimidated by your
0:17:04.960,0:17:13.680
femininity they're intimidated by the way you hold
the masculine so strongly if you want to find a
0:17:13.680,0:17:20.920
strong masculine counterpart you have to be in the
feminine the the masculine man that you're looking
0:17:20.920,0:17:29.040
for is looking for a feminine woman so even as
you start to embark on the process of finding one
0:17:29.040,0:17:35.960
for yourself you've got to be able to downshift
into your own femininity so that you're attracting
0:17:35.960,0:17:45.040
the right kind of person Opposites Attract they've
always said that now what what they mean is that
0:17:45.040,0:17:55.520
the masculine attracts the feminine and vice versa
so if you're bracing yourself and going out on
0:17:55.520,0:18:01.200
you know these Adventures to meet new people
with the mask of the masculine the world will
0:18:01.200,0:18:09.480
see you that way they will see how incredibly
capable in the masculine role you are and they
0:18:09.480,0:18:17.880
will D deflect or deflect or um resolve to be
in the feminine or you will end up attracting
0:18:17.880,0:18:24.800
a feminine partner a feminine man which again
every human has both polari so all exist Under
0:18:24.800,0:18:30.680
the Sun if you're looking to attract a masculine
man you need to being connected to your femininity
0:18:30.680,0:18:37.960
which first and foremost means being connected
to your intuitions and your emotion without
0:18:37.960,0:18:43.440
that connection to your intuition and emotion
the true masculine partner that you're looking
0:18:43.440,0:18:54.920
for every person is looking for their their
opposite and their equal right someone who can
0:18:54.920,0:19:00.440
compliment them someone who has what they don't
have who can bolster them who can bring them up
0:19:00.440,0:19:06.400
who can round out the yin to their Yang hope you
know that symbol that beautiful circular symbol
0:19:06.400,0:19:11.200
with the Paisley shapes on the inside both of
those Paisley shapes are required for that Circle
0:19:11.200,0:19:20.600
to roll on down the road of life so the masculine
man who has his providership his protectorship
0:19:20.600,0:19:29.400
his confidence his Direction in hand he's going
to need the emotional and intuitive connect ESS
0:19:29.400,0:19:36.240
of the feminine to truly make sure that he's on
the right course that his guidance and Leadership
0:19:36.240,0:19:43.120
is taking the right direction that his decisions
are benefiting those that he loves he needs the
0:19:43.120,0:19:49.960
feminine he needs that emotional and intuitive
connection and not only will he be desirous of
0:19:49.960,0:19:58.120
that he will cherish it so finding a masculine
partner who truly cherishes your emotions and
0:19:58.120,0:20:05.600
your intuition meaning that anytime you have
an emotional response or an or an intuitive hit
0:20:05.600,0:20:11.560
they're going to stop and listen of that they're
going to say hey tell me what that was let me
0:20:11.560,0:20:18.680
find a solution to this let me help you solve this
problem Men Are Great problem solvers especially
0:20:18.680,0:20:24.240
when they have that emotional and intuitive
guidance from the female the feminine woman
0:20:24.240,0:20:29.360
may be able to say you know what that doesn't feel
good or no that's not right yet and the man can
0:20:29.360,0:20:34.160
say okay well how about this how about this and
that bolsters their confidence and it bolsters
0:20:34.160,0:20:41.800
your feeling of being cherished trust me when I
say this is a win-win and again it's not weakness
0:20:41.800,0:20:47.640
suddenly we don't have to do all the guidance
and Leadership that's all handled the masculine
0:20:47.640,0:20:54.720
has got it and now we can settle into what we
do best which is to feel into life and where
0:20:54.720,0:21:03.880
life force and energy goes you also want want to
tap into your wild creativity creativity is that
0:21:03.880,0:21:11.720
unbridled experience of creating something from
nothing masculine men will be attracted to that
0:21:11.720,0:21:20.120
because they can help you get things done but that
creativity is a uniquely feminine quality and when
0:21:20.120,0:21:28.600
you are looking to meet the masculine man of your
dreams or at least right now then please be sure
0:21:28.600,0:21:36.280
not to pick up the masculine again because one
very quick way to turn that masculine partnership
0:21:36.280,0:21:43.640
into something else is to take the masculine upon
yourself because then where does his masculine go
0:21:43.640,0:21:50.080
either it becomes a fight between the two of
you or as you pick up more of the masculine
0:21:50.080,0:21:56.920
your partner will divest himself into the feminine
and then it becomes a relationship where either of
0:21:56.920,0:22:05.320
you is on the incorrect ity and it burns you both
out and it becomes a source of stress so your job
0:22:05.320,0:22:13.280
my fellow satisfied woman when you are looking
for intimate partnership with a masculine man is
0:22:13.280,0:22:21.440
to really Embrace and lean into your femininity
allow that masculine man to be in the masculine
0:22:21.440,0:22:31.240
and I understand trust me when I tell you that it
is not easy because we have been so indoctrinated
0:22:31.240,0:22:39.080
so inculturated into holding the masculine for
ourself it's difficult sometimes to get used to
0:22:39.080,0:22:44.880
or embrace the idea that we can just Outsource
it let it go we don't have to do all of the
0:22:44.880,0:22:52.400
things look we can we can we can pick that back up
anytime we need to but for now in order to stay in
0:22:52.400,0:22:59.520
this truly Dynamic oppositional partnership we
have got to stay firmly rooted in the feminine
0:22:59.520,0:23:04.840
because as soon as we start to take back more of
that masculine there's too much masculine energy
0:23:04.840,0:23:10.400
in this partnership and that wheel does not
roll on down the road of life so we have to
0:23:10.400,0:23:15.720
stay in the feminine which again is powerful it's
not submissive it doesn't mean you're suddenly
0:23:15.720,0:23:23.440
abdicating yourself we've been taught sometimes
that femininity is submissive or less valuable
0:23:23.440,0:23:30.480
it is not hopefully the rest of my podcast my
website my app everything that I provide for you
0:23:30.480,0:23:36.160
is helping you to better understand that I get
that it's going to be a long road to unwinding
0:23:36.160,0:23:42.280
some of the things that we perhaps have taken
on in this lifetime but let's start to take on
0:23:42.280,0:23:49.040
this role of femininity because when you find
a masculine partner the right masculine partner
0:23:49.040,0:23:55.760
for you then you need to allow him to be in his
masculine him being around you and your femininity
0:23:55.760,0:24:01.720
will allow his masculine entity to flourish and
and vice versa you will feel more energized by his
0:24:01.720,0:24:08.160
masculinity he will feel more energized by your
femininity and it will deepen the connection and
0:24:08.160,0:24:16.360
the partnership between you because what healthy
adults all crave is connection and partnership
0:24:16.360,0:24:22.760
they all crave commitment isn't that amazing
healthy adults all crave commitment on some
0:24:22.760,0:24:27.800
level at least at some point in their lives for
at least some duration of time so again if you
0:24:27.800,0:24:36.480
find yourself in that place let your masculine man
take on his masculinity enjoy your feminine space
0:24:36.480,0:24:44.880
and let him take the lead on decision making now
you're going to give your emotional and intuitive
0:24:44.880,0:24:51.400
input of course and this doesn't mean again
that you're abdicating yourself or just letting
0:24:51.400,0:24:58.760
him drive the show without taking your needs
into consideration remember the term satisfa
0:24:58.760,0:25:04.400
means the pleasure derived from the Fulfillment
of your wishes and needs now this means your
0:25:04.400,0:25:11.520
masculine partner is going to be very clued
in keyed in dialed in to your wishes and needs
0:25:11.520,0:25:20.600
and if he truly has your best interests at heart
which one of the Hallmarks of a good relationship
0:25:20.600,0:25:28.560
one of the key elements of trust in a good
relationship is that each of you makes decisions
0:25:28.560,0:25:35.880
with the highest and best interests of each other
and the partnership in mind not the individual
0:25:35.880,0:25:41.880
not the highest and best interests of just one
partner and not in a a martyrdom where it's only
0:25:41.880,0:25:47.680
the interests of the other one but that really
every decision is weighed on you know what is
0:25:47.680,0:25:55.320
this decision going to benefit my relationship
so have a little faith if your masculine partner
0:25:55.320,0:26:03.000
is the right one for you he's going to be very
interested in your wishes in your needs and how he
0:26:03.000,0:26:07.840
can make great decisions to help fulfill them now
it doesn't mean that all of his decision decisions
0:26:07.840,0:26:12.960
are going to be great so you'll utilize your
emotions and intuition and he'll be keyed into
0:26:12.960,0:26:19.920
you and when you say you know what honey I really
appreciate the direction that you're going however
0:26:19.920,0:26:26.240
this piece just feels a little off to me and then
conversation can ensue okay why here how about
0:26:26.240,0:26:32.480
this how about this let him give suggestions let
him course correct but that course correction like
0:26:32.480,0:26:38.280
the wind and the sails on a sailboat is going to
eventually help Drive the ship forward so if the
0:26:38.280,0:26:43.000
sales are a little off or if the trim is not right
on those sales the ship is going to have a hard
0:26:43.000,0:26:48.360
time sailing in a correct direction you're going
to be tending to those sales now I'm a sailor so
0:26:48.360,0:26:55.320
I do love my sailing metaphors trimming the sales
is how you get to the end goal the most efficient
0:26:55.320,0:27:02.400
way but it takes this sense of intuition and this
almost communion with nature to do it that's your
0:27:02.400,0:27:12.320
job that's your role satisfied woman you get to
commune with nature and let the masculine man know
0:27:12.320,0:27:17.520
well you know this course could be a little more
efficient this course could feel a little better
0:27:17.520,0:27:22.880
the we can find a better way over the wave so it's
not so choppy so you're intuitive and emotional
0:27:22.880,0:27:29.800
input are absolutely critical to the right partner
but let him steer and drive the direction that
0:27:29.800,0:27:38.560
will make him as the masculine just Thrive the
for if the formost qualities of the feminine are
0:27:38.560,0:27:47.440
intuition and emotions the foremost qualities of
the masculine are providership and protection you
0:27:47.440,0:27:55.240
have to let him provide and protect you now I
mean I get it I can hear some of the listeners
0:27:55.240,0:28:01.520
right now going I can provide and protect myself
I know know you can I know you can so can I
0:28:01.520,0:28:08.320
we're all capable of it however the purpose of a
partnership is that we don't have to do everything
0:28:08.320,0:28:14.440
all by ourselves anymore we are going to Outsource
it we're going to allow ourselves to be in the
0:28:14.440,0:28:21.800
feminine and our chosen masculine partner to be
in the masculine now as he's in the masculine
0:28:21.800,0:28:27.160
to shine up to really enhance his masculinity
to make him feel energized remember we're all
0:28:27.160,0:28:31.920
trying to avoid stress and burnout here we're all
trying to elevate our well-being the well-being of
0:28:31.920,0:28:39.880
the masculine is dependent on his ability to feel
like he's providing and protecting those he loves
0:28:39.880,0:28:47.400
now back in prehistoric times that was a very
literal role for the masculine today that can
0:28:47.400,0:28:56.880
have many meaning meanings your masculine man may
be a big strong guy who can literally physically
0:28:56.880,0:29:04.720
protect you and might be your jam awesome he might
also protect you from verbal harm by treating you
0:29:04.720,0:29:11.520
to very kind words he might also protect you
from some of his own emotional baggage by doing
0:29:11.520,0:29:19.920
his own work there are a lot of ways that a man
can protect those he loves doesn't have to mean
0:29:19.920,0:29:27.840
picking up a bow and arrow and aiming at the enemy
it's the modern era we are in a New Millennium we
0:29:27.840,0:29:34.920
are marching toward a bright future so please for
yourself really think about and consider what is
0:29:34.920,0:29:43.280
it that makes you feel protected and what is it
that makes you feel provided for doesn't mean he's
0:29:43.280,0:29:49.280
going to bring home the bacon it used to mean that
certainly and look even here in America women were
0:29:49.280,0:29:57.000
only allowed to get their own bank accounts
without a Man's Signature in like the 70s so
0:29:57.000,0:30:03.960
there was a real need to have a man in a woman's
life for that Financial Security and that level
0:30:03.960,0:30:13.720
of providership but I know a lot of incredible and
satisfied and successful women who make more money
0:30:13.720,0:30:21.320
than their masculine partners that is not an issue
it can be but it doesn't have to be if you make it
0:30:21.320,0:30:29.280
one it's not about the money it can be again if
your idea of providership sh is having him really
0:30:29.280,0:30:35.720
support you in that Financial way fine absolutely
fine but if that rankles you a little bit or if
0:30:35.720,0:30:41.400
you make money on your own and you don't need
him to contribute as much or you're okay with the
0:30:41.400,0:30:48.000
financial Dynamics being fluid then think about
what else might he provide maybe your man is an
0:30:48.000,0:30:54.400
incredible cook does he provide the meals for the
household does he do the grocery shopping because
0:30:54.400,0:31:00.480
you know what he's just better at it what is he
providing for you does he provide that loving
0:31:00.480,0:31:09.080
connection that you crave and does he provide it
generously men in their most healthy masculine
0:31:09.080,0:31:15.800
presence are generous they're generous and that's
not just financially generous that's anything
0:31:15.800,0:31:22.720
generous you'll know that this is the right
masculine partnership for you when you have trust
0:31:22.720,0:31:29.800
and again trust between partners means that they
always prioritize your relationship they think
0:31:29.800,0:31:36.720
about every interaction they have with friends if
I divulge this is it with my relationship in mind
0:31:36.720,0:31:42.160
so for example every relationship has problems
they all have conflict every one of them this is
0:31:42.160,0:31:47.200
not about looking for the perfect most Conflict
Free relationship this is about looking for the
0:31:47.200,0:31:52.800
right relationship for you it's going to have
conflict how you progress through it and how
0:31:52.800,0:31:57.960
you hold each other's Hearts through conflict
is probably going to determine the outcome of
0:31:57.960,0:32:04.240
the relationship but when there is conflict does
your partner go run off and tell his friends cuz
0:32:04.240,0:32:11.120
ultimately that creates a leak in the emotional
stability of a relationship and it doesn't have
0:32:11.120,0:32:17.160
the relationship's highest interest in mind okay
so every decision for someone who's in a truly
0:32:17.160,0:32:24.000
committed partnership every decision is laid
against the question does this have the highest
0:32:24.000,0:32:30.800
aim of my relationship in mind are these groceries
with the highest a of my relationship in mind it
0:32:30.800,0:32:35.960
becomes about you nurturing the relationship that
you're in it together that this is you're invested
0:32:35.960,0:32:40.920
in the relationship as much as you're invested
in each other both of you are contributing to
0:32:40.920,0:32:46.960
this beautiful third thing the relationship
itself and the things that you two can create
0:32:46.960,0:32:54.120
together that's what's precious that's what's
important and the relationship this third thing
0:32:54.120,0:33:05.520
is bigger than both of you so it will sometimes
require some personal sacrifice now I know that
0:33:05.520,0:33:13.040
um that can be difficult this idea of personal
sacrifice because many of us have the idea that
0:33:13.040,0:33:18.640
we not only do we want it all but that we should
have it all and yeah look I want all of us to
0:33:18.640,0:33:28.120
have everything we need too but anything that is
worth something costs something anything of value
0:33:28.120,0:33:37.240
is worth paying the price for and that discipline
of a little bit of self-sacrifice actually makes
0:33:37.240,0:33:43.000
the relationship more valuable and sweeter so
whether you have to sacrifice shopping at your
0:33:43.000,0:33:46.800
your favorite grocery store because it's a little
too expensive and you guys are on a budget right
0:33:46.800,0:33:55.280
now that's what you give up fine if what you give
up is um doing a certain activity that makes your
0:33:55.280,0:34:02.240
partner worry so much they can't self soothe over
it then perhaps you shove that activity while
0:34:02.240,0:34:07.120
you're in this partnership and that's something
that you offer to the relationship you know what
0:34:07.120,0:34:14.040
I I see the stress this causes my partner I see
that they are not having an easy time bringing
0:34:14.040,0:34:18.680
their nervous system back into regulation and
one of the actual physical benefits of being
0:34:18.680,0:34:24.280
in Partnership is co-regulation of the nervous
system and when your nervous system is regulated
0:34:24.280,0:34:29.320
no surprises here not only do you live longer you
have better health you have lower inflammation
0:34:29.320,0:34:34.880
you sleep better there's less stress there's lower
cortisol levels so co-regulation between intimate
0:34:34.880,0:34:41.520
partners and a healthy relationship wow is that
an added bonus or what statistically speaking
0:34:41.520,0:34:52.320
married men live longer and single unmarried men
true story love those facts so finally when you
0:34:52.320,0:34:56.320
let him take the masculine when you found a good
intimate partnership you'll you'll again you'll
0:34:56.320,0:35:03.160
know he's the right intimate partner for you
he cherishes you he cherishes you my primary
0:35:03.160,0:35:10.360
definition for cherishing is that he never leaves
you alone in your pain until a resolution is
0:35:10.360,0:35:15.400
reached even if he's the one that caused you the
pain okay so no matter where your pain is coming
0:35:15.400,0:35:21.600
from a true cherishing masculine partner will
never leave you alone in it until a resolution is
0:35:21.600,0:35:28.080
reached however that said that's my favorite
definition of cherishing I think that's the
0:35:28.080,0:35:31.920
primary definition of cherishing but there are
a lot of ways to be cherished there are a lot
0:35:31.920,0:35:42.080
of ways that you will feel honored for your
emotional intuitive feminine connection that
0:35:42.080,0:35:48.120
you will feel empowered to be in your feminine
because you see the power purpose and passion
0:35:48.120,0:35:54.680
it brings to both of your lives so how do you
want to be cherished let him cherish you if
0:35:54.680,0:35:59.920
you're not sure how you like to be cherished
or that you want to be cherished consider the
0:35:59.920,0:36:07.080
Love Languages so this there's a Lot About Love
Languages I'm I'm sure you've heard of them the
0:36:07.080,0:36:15.280
act of giftgiving Acts of service um positive
affirmations or kind words uh physical touch
0:36:15.280,0:36:21.200
and quality time are generally the five common
ones that are considered to be Love Languages
0:36:21.200,0:36:28.320
now there are it's not only you know you not
only want to consider how your partner wants
0:36:28.320,0:36:31.640
to be loved like what is their love language
let's say your partner's love language is acts
0:36:31.640,0:36:38.480
of service then they will feel loved when you
do acts of service for them your love language
0:36:38.480,0:36:43.000
might be physical touch so because your love
language is physical touch you might just want
0:36:43.000,0:36:49.280
to be physically in contact with them all of the
time but they won't feel loved because their love
0:36:49.280,0:36:54.360
language is acts of service so knowing for
yourself your own love language maybe it's
0:36:54.360,0:36:59.360
physical touch and words of affirmation you want
to communicate that to your masculine partner and
0:36:59.360,0:37:03.840
say hey look you might love acts of service you
might love making me breakfast in the morning
0:37:03.840,0:37:12.560
and I love that about you but I feel most loved
when you say kind things to me and Touch Me Gently
0:37:12.560,0:37:20.400
so keep doing breakfast but don't overlook the
power of dear sweet kind loving words and that
0:37:20.400,0:37:28.920
physical touch that you know that I crave let him
cherish you let him honor your emotional intuitive
0:37:28.920,0:37:37.000
femininity so you want to continue to be in
the feminine in this relationship and let the
0:37:37.000,0:37:41.320
relationship enhance and feed your feminine
and both of you will flourish together this
0:37:41.320,0:37:49.400
is my hope for you again this is not an easy Road
finding the right partner in any circumstance is
0:37:49.400,0:37:54.240
difficult I wish you the best but as you do
this when you decide a partnership is right
0:37:54.240,0:38:00.480
for you at this time make sure that you are in
the feminine so you attract the right masculine
0:38:00.480,0:38:06.040
partner for you I look forward to hearing how
this goes for you and frankly I look forward to
0:38:06.040,0:38:12.320
supporting you and having you support all of the
rest of the satisfied women in this community to
0:38:12.320,0:38:17.160
join this community make sure you download the
satisfied women app you're already here on the
0:38:17.160,0:38:22.600
satisfied women podcast and for access to
all of these resources as well as my book
0:38:22.600,0:38:28.520
check out my website thesatisfiedwoman.com
so until next time stay in your feminine
0:38:28.520,0:38:35.760
and continue to honor all that is powerful
and incredible about you satisfied woman
