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Welcome to The Satisfied Woman podcast in this 
episode we'll dig in to what it takes to really

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be the kind of feminine woman that attracts the 
right kind of masculine partner you don't have

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to even hardly dig deep into Google or Amazon 
if you do a quick search on the top books for

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women titles that include this kind of thing 
are at the top of the list it shows that this

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is a big area of interest for us so I want to 
give you some tips and techniques to find the

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right masculine partner for you welcome to 
the satisfied woman podcast I'm your host,

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Alanna Kaivalya, Ph.D. This podcast is dedicated 
to helping women lean into their femininity and

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rediscover the power of their feminine gifts we 
take a look at what it means to be a modern woman

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and how we can live A Satisfied life on our own 
terms visit the hub at thesatisfiedwoman.com. All

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right so I know that this might feel a little at 
least it does to me maybe controversial or maybe

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not appropriate given that the work that I do 
truly centers around empowering feminine women

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with my book The satisfied woman reclaiming 
your feminine power I aim to teach women how

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to really embody and embrace their femininity 
in this modern-day world to make sure that they

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live a satisfied life and in this day and age 
of female empowerment and women can do anything

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perhaps sometimes we've heard and I've heard 
maybe you have as well the line over and over

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again I don't need a man we can do it ourselves 
life doesn't require a partner look all of that

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is true I'm not here to rewrite that script or to 
take away from anyone who currently isn't seeking

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a partnership an intimate part parip however let's 
be honest at some point in our lives we will be

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interested in an intimate partnership we just will 
be as humans we're hardwired for intimacy we're

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hardwired for connection we want to establish an 
intimate relationship with another human being

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because we deeply desire to be seen to be known 
and to be loved that's just who we are that's just

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human so while there may be this rhetoric nowadays 
of we don't need a man or we don't need a partner

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in life we can do it all ourselves I want to 
challenge that a little bit or at the very least

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I want to give you permission to want a partner 
have a partner seek a partner if that is what is

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on tap for you right now if that feels natural 
and right for you and again there may be times

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in your life where you swear it off there may be 
times in your life where you don't want a partner

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or you're happy being single but in case you are 
in a time of your life that you'd like to have an

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intimate partner let me give you some insight 
as to how to find the right one now what I can

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say that I disagree with in terms of this idea 
of feminism being we can do it all ourselves is

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that we don't need an intimate partnership we do 
at some point in our lives we just do it's very

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difficult for any human to survive their entire 
life on their own we're not built that way in fact

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evolutionarily speaking we have gotten where we've 
gotten today because we have a tribal mindset

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because the success of our intimate group our 
familial group and our tribal group is important

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to our own success look we can't just turn off 
millions of years of training we're here to be in

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partnership with other people and we're here to 
be in Intimate partnership particularly feminine

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women now I get it that might sound unfair 
because I didn't list everybody everybody is

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hardwired to be in Partnership even masculine 
men even anybody on this planet absolutely but

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what I want to suggest is that the nuances of 
that desire and need for feminine women are a

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little bit different we need it because our DNA 
is encoded with this tribal desire for us to have

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longevity we not only want our physical body and 
ourselves to survive but we also want our progeny

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to survive and in a tribe setting that actually 
requires a good solid steady partner who is there

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to provide and protect this is simple history and 
simple basic human structure now whether not you

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want a family whether or not you want children as 
a feminine woman this is still in your DNA there

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is still this hormonal biological genetic encoding 
to desire a committed partnership again longterm

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short-term you choose I'm not dictating the terms 
I just want to give you the background on where

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this drive and desire comes from it doesn't 
indicate weakness either just because would

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like to have an intimate partner doesn't suddenly 
mean you're doing Womanhood wrong or doing modern

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Womanhood wrong in this day and age you're doing 
it absolutely right I would suggest that part of

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the fullness of life experience includes intimacy 
and partnership I would further suggest that

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especially in this day and age where a woman can 
handle all the basic things about her life she can

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pay her own rent she can get a job she can handle 
her bills she can open her own bank account she

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can drive her own car the ways in which women 
have achieved independence mean that intimate

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partnership may not serve those basic functions 
of providing for Safety and Security in life but

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may serve a higher basic function in terms of the 
emotional and psychological satisfaction that a

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woman craves we are after all more than just 
physical beings we're emotional beings we're

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intuitive beings we're creative beings we're 
sensual beings so again in this day and age of

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fierce Independence and pride amongst women for 
being able to do things theirselves I'm I'm all

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for it I'm all for it there still will be places 
in our life that intimate partnership will serve

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that really we need someone else to help with and 
that's okay again it's not a sign of weakness it's

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a sign of the fullest expression of your life it's 
a sign that you're not negating anything or saying

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no to anything in your life that might actually 
bring you more joy pleasure sensuality self-

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knowledge having an intimate partner may actually 
bring you a greater sense of Safety and Security

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yeah perhaps on the financial side of things or on 
just the physical security side of things but on

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the spirit spiritual side of things the emotional 
side of things the psychological side of things

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don't discount those as well what I want for 
all satisfied women is to have a rich and full

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life experience and that does include intimate 
partnership now for those of us women like you

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and like me who identify as feminine women then 
we are looking for a masculine partner now if

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you've read my book or listen to my other podcast 
then you know that the energies of masculinity and

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femininity exist inside every human regardless of 
gender regardless of sexuality so I'm not placing

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any limits either on how you express yourself or 
how your partner expresses yourself or how you

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express your sexual preferences everything under 
the sun is okay for the sake of this podcast what

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I will be addressing are feminine women who 
are looking for a masculine partner and who

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are looking for primarily a masculine man as 
a partner again everything under the sun is

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okay this is just how I'll be languaging things 
and speaking about things in this podcast but

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please hear me when I say that every expression is 
possible and it's just the limits of this podcast

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the time we have and my ability to speak in a 
concise manner on these things that's limiting

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my language for now so for the feminine woman 
who is looking for the masculine man the true

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masculine partnership again long-term short-term 
whatever term you desire here's another um perhaps

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counterintuitive concept to today's fiercely 
independent female in order to find a masculine

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counterpart we will need to drop the masculine 
mask now Dawning the mask of the masculine for

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the modernday independent Fierce fabulous female 
is not easy we live in a patriarchal culture we

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live in a society that values masculine energy 
and principles over the feminine we have been

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raised to even ourselves diminish and repress the 
feminine because it isn't as good let's say or

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looked upon as good as things that are masculine 
as women we're told we have to give ourselves away

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and so we do and we feel burnt out when women are 
ravaged and not ravished then our femininity is

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being exploited this is the condition of our 
current culture and so Dawning the mask of the

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masculine can not only be a pathway to traditional 
ideals of success it can be a method of protection

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because because exposing ourselves as the feminine 
beings that we are in certain settings in certain

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scenarios may not actually be safe for example 
something as innocuous as wherever it is that

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you work your workplace may have the old school 
deeply indoctrinated paradigms of masculinity

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built into it it may want a leader and followers 
they may have a hierarchical structure they may

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have key performance indicators or kpi they may 
have monthly goals or quarterly goals you may be

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accountable for some sort of metric that you have 
to reach some sort of very directed and linear

0:11:09.840,0:11:18.080
definition of success now that is all masculine 
and it doesn't mean that we can't not only play

0:11:18.080,0:11:23.760
that game but totally KCK Gass we just have to 
recognize that those are all masculine principles

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and values and they require us to elevate our 
masculine side in order to participate in that now

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if we're lucky enough to have a workplace or if we 
are lucky enough to have maybe our own business or

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our own menture or at least our own freedom to do 
with our lives as we wish in terms of career then

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we might be able to cultivate the kind of culture 
that values femininity and feminine principles

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even in the workplace one of my favorite 
examples of this is actually um channy Nicholas

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she's an astrologer she's a very well-known 
astrologer she has an app she's incredibly

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successful and she and her life partner have 
created her business this app the Outreach that

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they do all of the things that are under their 
empire from deeply feminine principles it is

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possible to achieve wild success from deeply 
seated feminine values in the workplace it's

0:12:29.320,0:12:37.800
just right now at least not the norm so we might 
be in a workplace setting where we have to Dawn

0:12:37.800,0:12:44.720
the masculine we might live alone where we have 
to do the masculine and The Feminine for ourselves

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which again living in this kind of culture 
means we often lean into the masculine more

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than we would like to as feminine women so Dawning 
the mask of the masculine is often a reality for

0:12:56.600,0:13:02.680
women of today and it can be difficult to find 
places and spes and circumstances where we can

0:13:02.680,0:13:10.960
truly drop that mask or it can be hard to drop 
it because we're so used to keeping it now this

0:13:10.960,0:13:17.360
is one of the challenges that I hear about when I 
speak to women about finding a masculine partner

0:13:17.360,0:13:24.080
because believe me as much as we'd like to be the 
independent DIY do everything for ourselves and

0:13:24.080,0:13:29.320
everyone else female who can play that masculine 
game and achieve all the success in life and not

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need anybody my own experience is that when you 
get women together in a place where they feel safe

0:13:38.560,0:13:46.120
what they express is a deep sense of longing 
and burnout a place where they can simply be

0:13:46.120,0:13:53.880
themselves and really downshift into the feminine 
into that sensual creative side of themselves so

0:13:53.880,0:13:59.040
we need places and spaces that hold the masculine 
for us and look we're working on that too

0:13:59.960,0:14:06.640
but one of the first places and spaces that we 
can cultivate where we're allowed to be in our

0:14:06.640,0:14:13.920
feminine is an intimate partnership the right 
masculine partner can hold the masculine for us

0:14:13.920,0:14:21.520
we effectively Outsource it to them so that we 
allow our feminin femininity to flourish that

0:14:21.520,0:14:28.360
is so critical to our own sense of well-being 
our own sense of authenticity our own sense of

0:14:28.360,0:14:35.400
connection to ourselves and our own ability to 
express ourselves with the fullest might that we

0:14:35.400,0:14:43.080
are capable of it allows for things to germinate 
inside of us whether that be an actual family or

0:14:43.080,0:14:51.520
whether that be a new idea something creative in 
ways that don't really have the space to flourish

0:14:51.520,0:14:56.960
if we're constantly holding the masculine for 
ourselves when we do that as feminine women

0:14:56.960,0:15:03.240
we create a lot of tension in our minds and our 
bodies and our hearts and if you're listening to

0:15:03.240,0:15:09.000
this and you feel both a heaviness when I talk 
about it and a sense of relief when I tell you

0:15:09.000,0:15:15.640
that yes there is hope then you understand what 
I'm saying and you understand it on a soul level

0:15:15.640,0:15:22.640
I've felt it too I've been there I was absolutely 
taught about the DIY nature of being a successful

0:15:22.640,0:15:29.080
female and having to do everything for myself and 
I I can do it I'm sure you can too or at least on

0:15:29.080,0:15:36.320
some level or maybe you're yearning to so let's 
not take this idea of intimate partnership as

0:15:36.320,0:15:43.120
weakness let's take it as a strength a way for 
us to have a strong outlet for our femininity

0:15:43.120,0:15:49.720
which It ultimately is going to make us more 
powerful when we try to hold both polarities

0:15:49.720,0:15:56.040
for ourselves we become exhausted and we can't 
do either one well when we have a partner who

0:15:56.040,0:16:03.280
can hold our opposing polarity then we get to 
lean into who we are most fully and flourish so

0:16:03.280,0:16:08.240
intimate partnership is a source of strength and 
a source of power but we got to find the right

0:16:08.240,0:16:15.960
partner now look I'm not going to lie that is also 
incredibly difficult in this day and age of dating

0:16:15.960,0:16:21.720
apps and the difficulty of meeting people out 
and about especially post pandemic this isn't

0:16:21.720,0:16:28.160
an easy Journey for anyone now I don't know how 
to counsel you through the use of dating apps or

0:16:28.160,0:16:35.880
the screening of of people but what I can say is 
that when you are embarking on finding the right

0:16:35.880,0:16:43.040
masculine partner or finding the man of your 
life the one who can hold that post for you is

0:16:43.040,0:16:50.240
you have to inhabit the feminine I can't tell 
you how many women I've spoken to who as soon

0:16:50.240,0:16:58.840
as they start dating they say to me Alana you 
know all these men are intimidated by me now I

0:16:59.400,0:17:04.960
understand that I mean women can be powerful but 
it's likely that they're not intimidated by your

0:17:04.960,0:17:13.680
femininity they're intimidated by the way you hold 
the masculine so strongly if you want to find a

0:17:13.680,0:17:20.920
strong masculine counterpart you have to be in the 
feminine the the masculine man that you're looking

0:17:20.920,0:17:29.040
for is looking for a feminine woman so even as 
you start to embark on the process of finding one

0:17:29.040,0:17:35.960
for yourself you've got to be able to downshift 
into your own femininity so that you're attracting

0:17:35.960,0:17:45.040
the right kind of person Opposites Attract they've 
always said that now what what they mean is that

0:17:45.040,0:17:55.520
the masculine attracts the feminine and vice versa 
so if you're bracing yourself and going out on

0:17:55.520,0:18:01.200
you know these Adventures to meet new people 
with the mask of the masculine the world will

0:18:01.200,0:18:09.480
see you that way they will see how incredibly 
capable in the masculine role you are and they

0:18:09.480,0:18:17.880
will D deflect or deflect or um resolve to be 
in the feminine or you will end up attracting

0:18:17.880,0:18:24.800
a feminine partner a feminine man which again 
every human has both polari so all exist Under

0:18:24.800,0:18:30.680
the Sun if you're looking to attract a masculine 
man you need to being connected to your femininity

0:18:30.680,0:18:37.960
which first and foremost means being connected 
to your intuitions and your emotion without

0:18:37.960,0:18:43.440
that connection to your intuition and emotion 
the true masculine partner that you're looking

0:18:43.440,0:18:54.920
for every person is looking for their their 
opposite and their equal right someone who can

0:18:54.920,0:19:00.440
compliment them someone who has what they don't 
have who can bolster them who can bring them up

0:19:00.440,0:19:06.400
who can round out the yin to their Yang hope you 
know that symbol that beautiful circular symbol

0:19:06.400,0:19:11.200
with the Paisley shapes on the inside both of 
those Paisley shapes are required for that Circle

0:19:11.200,0:19:20.600
to roll on down the road of life so the masculine 
man who has his providership his protectorship

0:19:20.600,0:19:29.400
his confidence his Direction in hand he's going 
to need the emotional and intuitive connect ESS

0:19:29.400,0:19:36.240
of the feminine to truly make sure that he's on 
the right course that his guidance and Leadership

0:19:36.240,0:19:43.120
is taking the right direction that his decisions 
are benefiting those that he loves he needs the

0:19:43.120,0:19:49.960
feminine he needs that emotional and intuitive 
connection and not only will he be desirous of

0:19:49.960,0:19:58.120
that he will cherish it so finding a masculine 
partner who truly cherishes your emotions and

0:19:58.120,0:20:05.600
your intuition meaning that anytime you have 
an emotional response or an or an intuitive hit

0:20:05.600,0:20:11.560
they're going to stop and listen of that they're 
going to say hey tell me what that was let me

0:20:11.560,0:20:18.680
find a solution to this let me help you solve this 
problem Men Are Great problem solvers especially

0:20:18.680,0:20:24.240
when they have that emotional and intuitive 
guidance from the female the feminine woman

0:20:24.240,0:20:29.360
may be able to say you know what that doesn't feel 
good or no that's not right yet and the man can

0:20:29.360,0:20:34.160
say okay well how about this how about this and 
that bolsters their confidence and it bolsters

0:20:34.160,0:20:41.800
your feeling of being cherished trust me when I 
say this is a win-win and again it's not weakness

0:20:41.800,0:20:47.640
suddenly we don't have to do all the guidance 
and Leadership that's all handled the masculine

0:20:47.640,0:20:54.720
has got it and now we can settle into what we 
do best which is to feel into life and where

0:20:54.720,0:21:03.880
life force and energy goes you also want want to 
tap into your wild creativity creativity is that

0:21:03.880,0:21:11.720
unbridled experience of creating something from 
nothing masculine men will be attracted to that

0:21:11.720,0:21:20.120
because they can help you get things done but that 
creativity is a uniquely feminine quality and when

0:21:20.120,0:21:28.600
you are looking to meet the masculine man of your 
dreams or at least right now then please be sure

0:21:28.600,0:21:36.280
not to pick up the masculine again because one 
very quick way to turn that masculine partnership

0:21:36.280,0:21:43.640
into something else is to take the masculine upon 
yourself because then where does his masculine go

0:21:43.640,0:21:50.080
either it becomes a fight between the two of 
you or as you pick up more of the masculine

0:21:50.080,0:21:56.920
your partner will divest himself into the feminine 
and then it becomes a relationship where either of

0:21:56.920,0:22:05.320
you is on the incorrect ity and it burns you both 
out and it becomes a source of stress so your job

0:22:05.320,0:22:13.280
my fellow satisfied woman when you are looking 
for intimate partnership with a masculine man is

0:22:13.280,0:22:21.440
to really Embrace and lean into your femininity 
allow that masculine man to be in the masculine

0:22:21.440,0:22:31.240
and I understand trust me when I tell you that it 
is not easy because we have been so indoctrinated

0:22:31.240,0:22:39.080
so inculturated into holding the masculine for 
ourself it's difficult sometimes to get used to

0:22:39.080,0:22:44.880
or embrace the idea that we can just Outsource 
it let it go we don't have to do all of the

0:22:44.880,0:22:52.400
things look we can we can we can pick that back up 
anytime we need to but for now in order to stay in

0:22:52.400,0:22:59.520
this truly Dynamic oppositional partnership we 
have got to stay firmly rooted in the feminine

0:22:59.520,0:23:04.840
because as soon as we start to take back more of 
that masculine there's too much masculine energy

0:23:04.840,0:23:10.400
in this partnership and that wheel does not 
roll on down the road of life so we have to

0:23:10.400,0:23:15.720
stay in the feminine which again is powerful it's 
not submissive it doesn't mean you're suddenly

0:23:15.720,0:23:23.440
abdicating yourself we've been taught sometimes 
that femininity is submissive or less valuable

0:23:23.440,0:23:30.480
it is not hopefully the rest of my podcast my 
website my app everything that I provide for you

0:23:30.480,0:23:36.160
is helping you to better understand that I get 
that it's going to be a long road to unwinding

0:23:36.160,0:23:42.280
some of the things that we perhaps have taken 
on in this lifetime but let's start to take on

0:23:42.280,0:23:49.040
this role of femininity because when you find 
a masculine partner the right masculine partner

0:23:49.040,0:23:55.760
for you then you need to allow him to be in his 
masculine him being around you and your femininity

0:23:55.760,0:24:01.720
will allow his masculine entity to flourish and 
and vice versa you will feel more energized by his

0:24:01.720,0:24:08.160
masculinity he will feel more energized by your 
femininity and it will deepen the connection and

0:24:08.160,0:24:16.360
the partnership between you because what healthy 
adults all crave is connection and partnership

0:24:16.360,0:24:22.760
they all crave commitment isn't that amazing 
healthy adults all crave commitment on some

0:24:22.760,0:24:27.800
level at least at some point in their lives for 
at least some duration of time so again if you

0:24:27.800,0:24:36.480
find yourself in that place let your masculine man 
take on his masculinity enjoy your feminine space

0:24:36.480,0:24:44.880
and let him take the lead on decision making now 
you're going to give your emotional and intuitive

0:24:44.880,0:24:51.400
input of course and this doesn't mean again 
that you're abdicating yourself or just letting

0:24:51.400,0:24:58.760
him drive the show without taking your needs 
into consideration remember the term satisfa

0:24:58.760,0:25:04.400
means the pleasure derived from the Fulfillment 
of your wishes and needs now this means your

0:25:04.400,0:25:11.520
masculine partner is going to be very clued 
in keyed in dialed in to your wishes and needs

0:25:11.520,0:25:20.600
and if he truly has your best interests at heart 
which one of the Hallmarks of a good relationship

0:25:20.600,0:25:28.560
one of the key elements of trust in a good 
relationship is that each of you makes decisions

0:25:28.560,0:25:35.880
with the highest and best interests of each other 
and the partnership in mind not the individual

0:25:35.880,0:25:41.880
not the highest and best interests of just one 
partner and not in a a martyrdom where it's only

0:25:41.880,0:25:47.680
the interests of the other one but that really 
every decision is weighed on you know what is

0:25:47.680,0:25:55.320
this decision going to benefit my relationship 
so have a little faith if your masculine partner

0:25:55.320,0:26:03.000
is the right one for you he's going to be very 
interested in your wishes in your needs and how he

0:26:03.000,0:26:07.840
can make great decisions to help fulfill them now 
it doesn't mean that all of his decision decisions

0:26:07.840,0:26:12.960
are going to be great so you'll utilize your 
emotions and intuition and he'll be keyed into

0:26:12.960,0:26:19.920
you and when you say you know what honey I really 
appreciate the direction that you're going however

0:26:19.920,0:26:26.240
this piece just feels a little off to me and then 
conversation can ensue okay why here how about

0:26:26.240,0:26:32.480
this how about this let him give suggestions let 
him course correct but that course correction like

0:26:32.480,0:26:38.280
the wind and the sails on a sailboat is going to 
eventually help Drive the ship forward so if the

0:26:38.280,0:26:43.000
sales are a little off or if the trim is not right 
on those sales the ship is going to have a hard

0:26:43.000,0:26:48.360
time sailing in a correct direction you're going 
to be tending to those sales now I'm a sailor so

0:26:48.360,0:26:55.320
I do love my sailing metaphors trimming the sales 
is how you get to the end goal the most efficient

0:26:55.320,0:27:02.400
way but it takes this sense of intuition and this 
almost communion with nature to do it that's your

0:27:02.400,0:27:12.320
job that's your role satisfied woman you get to 
commune with nature and let the masculine man know

0:27:12.320,0:27:17.520
well you know this course could be a little more 
efficient this course could feel a little better

0:27:17.520,0:27:22.880
the we can find a better way over the wave so it's 
not so choppy so you're intuitive and emotional

0:27:22.880,0:27:29.800
input are absolutely critical to the right partner 
but let him steer and drive the direction that

0:27:29.800,0:27:38.560
will make him as the masculine just Thrive the 
for if the formost qualities of the feminine are

0:27:38.560,0:27:47.440
intuition and emotions the foremost qualities of 
the masculine are providership and protection you

0:27:47.440,0:27:55.240
have to let him provide and protect you now I 
mean I get it I can hear some of the listeners

0:27:55.240,0:28:01.520
right now going I can provide and protect myself 
I know know you can I know you can so can I

0:28:01.520,0:28:08.320
we're all capable of it however the purpose of a 
partnership is that we don't have to do everything

0:28:08.320,0:28:14.440
all by ourselves anymore we are going to Outsource 
it we're going to allow ourselves to be in the

0:28:14.440,0:28:21.800
feminine and our chosen masculine partner to be 
in the masculine now as he's in the masculine

0:28:21.800,0:28:27.160
to shine up to really enhance his masculinity 
to make him feel energized remember we're all

0:28:27.160,0:28:31.920
trying to avoid stress and burnout here we're all 
trying to elevate our well-being the well-being of

0:28:31.920,0:28:39.880
the masculine is dependent on his ability to feel 
like he's providing and protecting those he loves

0:28:39.880,0:28:47.400
now back in prehistoric times that was a very 
literal role for the masculine today that can

0:28:47.400,0:28:56.880
have many meaning meanings your masculine man may 
be a big strong guy who can literally physically

0:28:56.880,0:29:04.720
protect you and might be your jam awesome he might 
also protect you from verbal harm by treating you

0:29:04.720,0:29:11.520
to very kind words he might also protect you 
from some of his own emotional baggage by doing

0:29:11.520,0:29:19.920
his own work there are a lot of ways that a man 
can protect those he loves doesn't have to mean

0:29:19.920,0:29:27.840
picking up a bow and arrow and aiming at the enemy 
it's the modern era we are in a New Millennium we

0:29:27.840,0:29:34.920
are marching toward a bright future so please for 
yourself really think about and consider what is

0:29:34.920,0:29:43.280
it that makes you feel protected and what is it 
that makes you feel provided for doesn't mean he's

0:29:43.280,0:29:49.280
going to bring home the bacon it used to mean that 
certainly and look even here in America women were

0:29:49.280,0:29:57.000
only allowed to get their own bank accounts 
without a Man's Signature in like the 70s so

0:29:57.000,0:30:03.960
there was a real need to have a man in a woman's 
life for that Financial Security and that level

0:30:03.960,0:30:13.720
of providership but I know a lot of incredible and 
satisfied and successful women who make more money

0:30:13.720,0:30:21.320
than their masculine partners that is not an issue 
it can be but it doesn't have to be if you make it

0:30:21.320,0:30:29.280
one it's not about the money it can be again if 
your idea of providership sh is having him really

0:30:29.280,0:30:35.720
support you in that Financial way fine absolutely 
fine but if that rankles you a little bit or if

0:30:35.720,0:30:41.400
you make money on your own and you don't need 
him to contribute as much or you're okay with the

0:30:41.400,0:30:48.000
financial Dynamics being fluid then think about 
what else might he provide maybe your man is an

0:30:48.000,0:30:54.400
incredible cook does he provide the meals for the 
household does he do the grocery shopping because

0:30:54.400,0:31:00.480
you know what he's just better at it what is he 
providing for you does he provide that loving

0:31:00.480,0:31:09.080
connection that you crave and does he provide it 
generously men in their most healthy masculine

0:31:09.080,0:31:15.800
presence are generous they're generous and that's 
not just financially generous that's anything

0:31:15.800,0:31:22.720
generous you'll know that this is the right 
masculine partnership for you when you have trust

0:31:22.720,0:31:29.800
and again trust between partners means that they 
always prioritize your relationship they think

0:31:29.800,0:31:36.720
about every interaction they have with friends if 
I divulge this is it with my relationship in mind

0:31:36.720,0:31:42.160
so for example every relationship has problems 
they all have conflict every one of them this is

0:31:42.160,0:31:47.200
not about looking for the perfect most Conflict 
Free relationship this is about looking for the

0:31:47.200,0:31:52.800
right relationship for you it's going to have 
conflict how you progress through it and how

0:31:52.800,0:31:57.960
you hold each other's Hearts through conflict 
is probably going to determine the outcome of

0:31:57.960,0:32:04.240
the relationship but when there is conflict does 
your partner go run off and tell his friends cuz

0:32:04.240,0:32:11.120
ultimately that creates a leak in the emotional 
stability of a relationship and it doesn't have

0:32:11.120,0:32:17.160
the relationship's highest interest in mind okay 
so every decision for someone who's in a truly

0:32:17.160,0:32:24.000
committed partnership every decision is laid 
against the question does this have the highest

0:32:24.000,0:32:30.800
aim of my relationship in mind are these groceries 
with the highest a of my relationship in mind it

0:32:30.800,0:32:35.960
becomes about you nurturing the relationship that 
you're in it together that this is you're invested

0:32:35.960,0:32:40.920
in the relationship as much as you're invested 
in each other both of you are contributing to

0:32:40.920,0:32:46.960
this beautiful third thing the relationship 
itself and the things that you two can create

0:32:46.960,0:32:54.120
together that's what's precious that's what's 
important and the relationship this third thing

0:32:54.120,0:33:05.520
is bigger than both of you so it will sometimes 
require some personal sacrifice now I know that

0:33:05.520,0:33:13.040
um that can be difficult this idea of personal 
sacrifice because many of us have the idea that

0:33:13.040,0:33:18.640
we not only do we want it all but that we should 
have it all and yeah look I want all of us to

0:33:18.640,0:33:28.120
have everything we need too but anything that is 
worth something costs something anything of value

0:33:28.120,0:33:37.240
is worth paying the price for and that discipline 
of a little bit of self-sacrifice actually makes

0:33:37.240,0:33:43.000
the relationship more valuable and sweeter so 
whether you have to sacrifice shopping at your

0:33:43.000,0:33:46.800
your favorite grocery store because it's a little 
too expensive and you guys are on a budget right

0:33:46.800,0:33:55.280
now that's what you give up fine if what you give 
up is um doing a certain activity that makes your

0:33:55.280,0:34:02.240
partner worry so much they can't self soothe over 
it then perhaps you shove that activity while

0:34:02.240,0:34:07.120
you're in this partnership and that's something 
that you offer to the relationship you know what

0:34:07.120,0:34:14.040
I I see the stress this causes my partner I see 
that they are not having an easy time bringing

0:34:14.040,0:34:18.680
their nervous system back into regulation and 
one of the actual physical benefits of being

0:34:18.680,0:34:24.280
in Partnership is co-regulation of the nervous 
system and when your nervous system is regulated

0:34:24.280,0:34:29.320
no surprises here not only do you live longer you 
have better health you have lower inflammation

0:34:29.320,0:34:34.880
you sleep better there's less stress there's lower 
cortisol levels so co-regulation between intimate

0:34:34.880,0:34:41.520
partners and a healthy relationship wow is that 
an added bonus or what statistically speaking

0:34:41.520,0:34:52.320
married men live longer and single unmarried men 
true story love those facts so finally when you

0:34:52.320,0:34:56.320
let him take the masculine when you found a good 
intimate partnership you'll you'll again you'll

0:34:56.320,0:35:03.160
know he's the right intimate partner for you 
he cherishes you he cherishes you my primary

0:35:03.160,0:35:10.360
definition for cherishing is that he never leaves 
you alone in your pain until a resolution is

0:35:10.360,0:35:15.400
reached even if he's the one that caused you the 
pain okay so no matter where your pain is coming

0:35:15.400,0:35:21.600
from a true cherishing masculine partner will 
never leave you alone in it until a resolution is

0:35:21.600,0:35:28.080
reached however that said that's my favorite 
definition of cherishing I think that's the

0:35:28.080,0:35:31.920
primary definition of cherishing but there are 
a lot of ways to be cherished there are a lot

0:35:31.920,0:35:42.080
of ways that you will feel honored for your 
emotional intuitive feminine connection that

0:35:42.080,0:35:48.120
you will feel empowered to be in your feminine 
because you see the power purpose and passion

0:35:48.120,0:35:54.680
it brings to both of your lives so how do you 
want to be cherished let him cherish you if

0:35:54.680,0:35:59.920
you're not sure how you like to be cherished 
or that you want to be cherished consider the

0:35:59.920,0:36:07.080
Love Languages so this there's a Lot About Love 
Languages I'm I'm sure you've heard of them the

0:36:07.080,0:36:15.280
act of giftgiving Acts of service um positive 
affirmations or kind words uh physical touch

0:36:15.280,0:36:21.200
and quality time are generally the five common 
ones that are considered to be Love Languages

0:36:21.200,0:36:28.320
now there are it's not only you know you not 
only want to consider how your partner wants

0:36:28.320,0:36:31.640
to be loved like what is their love language 
let's say your partner's love language is acts

0:36:31.640,0:36:38.480
of service then they will feel loved when you 
do acts of service for them your love language

0:36:38.480,0:36:43.000
might be physical touch so because your love 
language is physical touch you might just want

0:36:43.000,0:36:49.280
to be physically in contact with them all of the 
time but they won't feel loved because their love

0:36:49.280,0:36:54.360
language is acts of service so knowing for 
yourself your own love language maybe it's

0:36:54.360,0:36:59.360
physical touch and words of affirmation you want 
to communicate that to your masculine partner and

0:36:59.360,0:37:03.840
say hey look you might love acts of service you 
might love making me breakfast in the morning

0:37:03.840,0:37:12.560
and I love that about you but I feel most loved 
when you say kind things to me and Touch Me Gently

0:37:12.560,0:37:20.400
so keep doing breakfast but don't overlook the 
power of dear sweet kind loving words and that

0:37:20.400,0:37:28.920
physical touch that you know that I crave let him 
cherish you let him honor your emotional intuitive

0:37:28.920,0:37:37.000
femininity so you want to continue to be in 
the feminine in this relationship and let the

0:37:37.000,0:37:41.320
relationship enhance and feed your feminine 
and both of you will flourish together this

0:37:41.320,0:37:49.400
is my hope for you again this is not an easy Road 
finding the right partner in any circumstance is

0:37:49.400,0:37:54.240
difficult I wish you the best but as you do 
this when you decide a partnership is right

0:37:54.240,0:38:00.480
for you at this time make sure that you are in 
the feminine so you attract the right masculine

0:38:00.480,0:38:06.040
partner for you I look forward to hearing how 
this goes for you and frankly I look forward to

0:38:06.040,0:38:12.320
supporting you and having you support all of the 
rest of the satisfied women in this community to

0:38:12.320,0:38:17.160
join this community make sure you download the 
satisfied women app you're already here on the

0:38:17.160,0:38:22.600
satisfied women podcast and for access to 
all of these resources as well as my book

0:38:22.600,0:38:28.520
check out my website thesatisfiedwoman.com 
so until next time stay in your feminine

0:38:28.520,0:38:35.760
and continue to honor all that is powerful 
and incredible about you satisfied woman